Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
