think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
