the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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