none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize