That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize