I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
