i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
