I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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