So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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