oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
