These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
He called his prostate his "boner button".
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
