whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
no you cant smoke seaweed
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
