That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
ttyl tear gas
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Everyone says I win the strip club
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Your penis caused this!
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