Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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