quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
