Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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