i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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