i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize
