let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
ugly people sure do ruin things
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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