i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
there is glitter all over my balls
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