I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Randomize
