In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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