If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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