oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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