his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
