my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
