Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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