It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
