Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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