I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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