He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
