she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
