this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
These tits shall not be calmed
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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