if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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