And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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