8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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