I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
