would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
