I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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