well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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