there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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