I only kidnapped one of them. chill
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
