It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize