I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
