Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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