but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
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