The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
