smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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