...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
