remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
