So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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